Two-Weeks' Notice

By now I should have learned to plan on an hour to get anywhere in London. I went to an audition near Spitalfields market – only three tube stops away – so I figured half an hour was plenty of time. The rehearsal room was only a few doors down, they said. I left according to schedule and all was fine. I had even factored in the five-minute wait at Angel tube and the three-minute wait to change trains at Moorgate. Unfortunately, I had not planned on the 10-minute walk from Liverpool Street to the audition (they must have a different definition of “a few doors down”).

I walked swiftly and, with my trusty “A to Z” map in hand, I got to the place only two minutes late. Practically on time. Someone walked in just after me – phew. It’s always better if you’re not the last one.

I vocally warmed up this morning (if singing Christina Aguilera’s “Beautiful” in the shower counts), but I have had a cold for over a week now. We’re talking serious phlegm, and no tissues in my enormous-should-have-everything-I-ever-need-in-it handbag. I’ll just pop to the loo when I arrive.

I looked around. No loo.

“We’ll just close all the windows and door to block out the street noise,” the director said.

This is London, so there is no air conditioning. Great. I am sweating like a madwoman from the tube and the walk. I just need ten seconds to blot off the sweat with my compact and come up with a creative way to de-phlegm.

“Lucy, why don’t you sit on the couch and we’ll start with you? You don’t mind if we tape this I hope.”

So my sweaty face is preserved forever on film. Hopefully she’ll destroy the tape before I’m fabulously successful.

Despite the beginning, I felt the audition went quite well. She taped us in some “real” conversations and told everyone to discuss their first time. No one would say anything, except one guy who said his first sexual experience was with a horse. He declined to provide further details.

I read for a few scenes and then the director said they’d have callbacks in two weeks.

I’m out of town in two weeks.